YOU PROBABLY THINK I'M NUTS
I'm wondering myself, especially of an evening without much sleep and serious burn out. I'm living a bizarre life right now. Got another word today from my agent, ********* coming. it'll have to be spelled out for me. I know what I'm asking God for in a wife is extremely unusual and I doubt it would ever work for someone in a normal situation. He sent me on this mission, I stumbled across the prophets who gave me the message, hadn't sought them out. When given the same messages from different sources, also about inventing new technology it lends credibility. I was also told about meeting a couple angels and being transported, thought it was all crazy at the time but it seems to be happening.
I t dawned on me today that God just might give me the wife and I could see how He could make it happen. If I'm supposed to clean up enough for communication with God the father, he's just about going to have to give me a wife to keep me from impure thoughts with all the beautiful bare flesh I see all over the place, unless He makes me a eunuch and I'm not volunteering for that, especially with months of celibacy. It seems she could help me with work, around the house and yard and give me more time for study.
He sent me on this, if He wants me to succeed, He needs to help me. I don't understand God. If He makes the rules, why can't He bend them for His purposes, meet me halfway, just have Jesus give someone like ****** a string of word of knowledge. Can you think of any reason having been briefly dead or hanging on a tree for a few seconds in serious pain would make me special?
This may be a posting but what's His relationship with satan anyway? They're supposed to be in battle but seem to be working together. As with Job, as with me. I know God didn't give me panic attacks, anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, etc. but He "turned me over to satan," same difference to me. He uses satan for His purposes but why does satan help Him? Satan has to get clearance from God before He does anything. It sounds like they're on the same team.
Some more deep thoughts. Does God have limits? With an infinite number of outcomes for every split second of every person's life depending on any tiny action they take, the math becomes something like infinity to the power of infinity times infinity to the power of infinity. Does God really know the future? If so, why'd He send the watchers down knowing they were going to screw up His plan and create Nephilim and demons. Why'd he make Saul king if He knew He'd regret it? Why'd He make humanity if He knew he'd regret it and create the flood, that could have been strictly to block more demons but the Bible tells us He regretted creating us.
I know He knows my thoughts, just saw how they get sent up as prayer even if unintentionally. I started to post that I can't share any more messages but that'd be sharing a message so I might get in trouble for that. I'm in a scary place ******. Can you give me any feedback? Am I making you nervous? Would you like me to go away?
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