14. ONCE SAVED, ALWAYS SAVED?

Note: There'll be some repetition here if you're reading all the way through my blog, sorry but I want this to stand alone for readers just reading this posting.
   
     At a funeral for a member of our congregation who'd committed suicide, the pastor said, "We believe that once saved, always saved."  Who is we?  Church doctrine, we members?  Not I, I thought. I'm going to read the Bible and think for myself.  This same pastor had once preached about how the Bible was the inerrant, infallible word of God, should be believed and followed in its entirety.  I hear the same thing from many others.  Ok, so why aren't they doing that?  I know with certainty from personal experience the gifts didn't end with the disciples as some preach and have pointed out scripture to the contrary.  I'm trying to discuss this now with a local pastor but he won't talk to me.
     Salvation is a free gift, works aren't absolutely required but are highly encouraged, God is very merciful, forgiving us 70 times 7 as Jesus said.  I don't think that means we're done at 490 though, I think it just means over and over and over, much like 40 days in the wilderness doesn't mean 40 exact days but was used to express about that length of time, maybe 26 days, maybe 42.  We are told not to abuse grace but we're all going to sin.  Is there a point of no return after too much abuse of grace?  Here's some scripture that leads me to believe we can lose our salvation:

Ez 3:20  "Again, when a righteous person turns from their righteousness and does evil, and I put a stumbling block before them, they will die.  Since you did not warn them they will die for their sin. the righteous things that person did will not be remembered..."
     I'll watch for it next time through the old testament but I've read a verse to the effect that just as a man can go from bad to good, he can also go from good to bad.

Heb 6:4-6 "It is impossible for those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, who have shared in the Holy Spirit who have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the coming age and who have fallen away, to be brought back to repentance."  Author not certain but he's almost as bad as I am with run on sentences.  I thought I was in this category for a while.

Edit from 6-15-15 see also HEBREWS 2; 1-4, 3:7 - 19, 10: 26 - 31, (the warning verses)

John 5:16  "If you see any brother or sister commit a sin that does not lead to death, you should pray and God will give them life.  I refer to those whose sin does not lead to death.  There is a sin that leads to death.  I am not saying you should pray about that."
     A couple things here we can't be sure about.  There's a certain sin, that once committed, we just forget about the sinner and don't even try to pray for him or lead him back.  Nobody seems to know just what that sin is, maybe blaspemy against the Holy Spirit again but that's not clear.  I've tried to find out because I don't want to be guilty of it.  Then there's a question of the death.  Is God going to kill them and take them to heaven for their own good or are they going to hell or just eternal nothingness.  I don't think that can be said for certain either.

Mark 3:28 "Truly I tell you, people can be forgiven all their sins and every slander they utter, but whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven; they are guilty of an eternal sin."
     I want to be sure not to do this either.  It seems to mean accusing Jesus of doing His work by the power of satan.  Some similar verse appears 3 times in the gospels.

     Jesus tells us in John 10:27-30 "My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, they follow me.  I give them eternal life, and they shall not perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand.  My Father who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father's hand.  I and the Father are one."
     That's very reassuring.  I've been told I think too much, am over analytical.  Maybe so but my eternity is important to me.  How do we measure faith?  Are we sure we really believed or did we just try real hard because we want a fire policy?  Maybe we weren't true believers in the first place.  Like the verses about works that say "It's as if you had no faith at all," "Faith without works is dead." Does that mean we really didn't have faith to begin with?
     About faith without works, Cor 3 tells us our works will be tested, verse 15 "If it is burned up, the builder will suffer loss yet will be saved - even though only as one escaping through the flames."  So if we have true faith but no works it looks like we're in the club but just by the skin of our teeth.  Also see REV 2:23 "...I will repay each of you according to your deeds."
     I'm going to hedge my bet and do a few works.  I do a bit of charity remodeling on houses.  Years ago I was about to start a christian t-shirt / gym shirt business but one of my sons asked me, "What's the point, you can get on line and make any t-shirt you want," so I dropped that idea but still had a few printed up.  I put on the back of my old marine corps field jacket, "Life is short, eternity is forever," and my favorite, salvation gym shirt, "Proclaim me before men, I'll proclaim you before the Father - Jesus."  I've noticed that in 3 of the gospels, sometimes negatively, "If you are ashamed of me, I'll be ashamed of you."  I'm happy to let the world know what I believe and it's started a lot of fellowship with brothers and sisters who'll comment, "I like your shirt, (or jacket)."
     You don't have to give away everything and go to a third world country and risk your life, you can smile at people, bring up Jesus and God in conversations.  This took some effort for me as an introvert but it's working.  I think God directed me to write this blog.
     How about people who thought they were believers but changed their minds and are going out for a bit of rape, pillage and plunder after work?  Are they saved? Or people who still are believers but are angry at God and deliberately sinning?
     A few months after I had a spiritual experience in the gym, previously described, and was left with the knowledge I was through being Jezebel's scapegoat and my life was about to get a lot better, my life went to a bad place.  On one occasion I was cursing God, calling Him a liar, tearing up the Bible I was using and flushing it down the toilet.  This was in the middle of the night and I was trying to muffle my sobs so as not to wake up my cell mate.   For a while I couldn't seem to stay out of jail over something I hadn't done.  Where's this good life you promised me God?  I think it may be starting now, 3 1/2 years later.
     We're supposed to behave in an effort to please God, not out of fear of punishment but if I know for sure that I'm saved regardless of what I do, I might go out and sin a little.  I've admitted to a certain weakness related to co dependency.  I'll put it this way.  The anti christ will not crave the flesh of women.  I know with absolute certainty I'm not the anti christ.  You figure it out.
     In the quaint little mountain village I've just moved to, where everyone's a christian, I've stumbled across a small chapter of the world's oldest profession.  Por solamente treinta dolores, puedo tener una senorita bonita.  I didn't want to say that out loud.  God's been giving me a lot of help in this area though.  Thanks God, but couldn't I at least get a date, maybe a conversation going with a good christian woman with some possibilities?  I'll be good.  I promise.  I'm truly hoping God will put the right woman in my life for one more relationship but I want her now, not in God's timing.
     Think for yourselves, but I choose to believe my salvation's not an absolute guarantee and will try to act accordingly.